Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Monday Weigh-In

Today's Weight: 261.0

It's a loss of 2.8!


That's all. :)

11 pounds to go until my next progress pictures.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

(Late) Monday Weigh-In

Yesterday's Weight: 263.8

It. Is. Coming. OFF!

13.8 pounds until my next progress pictures.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Do you every wonder?

Do you ever wonder even if you lose all the weight, you'll still feel fat?

I don't think I feel any different about myself than when I did at 335.

I still look in the mirror and see what I've always seen.

Diet is going great, actually, though. I feel great, too. I think it has something to do with the feeling of control finally.

I *really* want to be sharing my next progress pictures by the end of September.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I'm Done.

I’m done.
No, not with weight loss, but I am done with what I’m doing. I have hit a wall, smack in the face, and I realize that I’m not happy losing the way I am. I’ve thought a LOT about it – a lot. I’m losing 4-5 pounds a month.
In total, I had 160 pounds to lose. And that was just if I wanted to get to the high end of “normal”, at 175 for my height. Actually I think it may be 170 that I should hit. At 5 pounds a month, that would be 32 continuous months. Only, this hasn’t been continuous. I’ve been at this since January of 2010, and I’m at 267. I’ve lost 68 pounds in, let’s say, 20 months. That’s less than 4 pounds a month, and that means it’s going to be even longer than 32 months.
Why? Why would I wait to be 2 ½ years older before I lose weight?
So I’m re-vamping, with the help of a dear friend. And I’m getting my fat ass up in the mornings at 5:30, and walking for 30 minutes. And I’m getting my fat ass back out at night, and walking for an hour.
I can worry about maintenance when it comes. I need this crap off me now, I hate it. I hate this fat more than anything hunger can ever do to me.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Weigh-In Monday

Today's Weight: 272.6

Yuck, a loss of 2.6 for two weeks. Ah, well. At least it is a loss.

New pictures at 250! I am ready to get there.

Have a great day!

Sunday, August 14, 2011

I suck at this scheduled posting thing.

So I was out of town last week on business, and I though I scheduled a post to come out on Monday. Evidently I fail at that. Anyway, here are the pics. Note the FIRST picture is the new one, the SECOND is the old one. I can see it, I think I'm losing a butt I didn't have to begin with!

Now if I took a poll, everyone would still say both are "Fat." However, if I asked which was fatter, it would be the second picture! YAY! haha :) Small victories.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

My day's beef.

I have the pictures in my camera, now to just find the time to upload. I really was surprised to see the difference; I didn’t figure there would be much visible difference. Of course, I have bought new bras in between as well, that doesn’t hurt. (I’m a recently converted believer to Cacique!)
It is time to move on to today’s beef. Normally, I rarely get offended by anything. Bust out the women jokes, the fat jokes, the white jokes; I can take it. Bust my ass for not sticking to my diet – I need that, it doesn’t offend me. But for some reason – and I may just be hormonal – a post on Twitter by a colleague just ran all over me yesterday.
“Fat girls could solve all their problems if they tried as hard to fit into running shoes as they do skinny jeans.”
First off, jack-wad, just about every pair of jeans I own look like skinny jeans, because I’m fat. It is hard to find clothes that fit right when you are large.
Secondly, it runs all over me that you assume that all my problems are going to be magically solved if I would just lose weight. Tell me – is your skinny ass free of problems? Is that the magic cure-all to everything, just get skinny?
Thirdly… okay the only thirdly I can think of is to say Eff you. It is harder to lose weight than just about anything else I can think of; I have to be around my vice each and every day. I am bombarded with marketing ads that tell me I need to eat. I’m surrounded by fast food stores on every corner. I have to eat to live.
Okay, rant over. J

Monday, August 1, 2011

Weigh-In Monday

Today's Weight: 275.2

Break out the camera! :) I made it to 275, finally. I will be taking some progress pictures tonight, and I think I'll take my measurements so I can update those as the rest of the year progresses as well.

I am excited!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011


I'm at the dentist today, and for some strange reason my new(er) dentist takes your temperature and blood pressure. Anyway, I'm pretty much ignoring the chick as she does her business, my mind is off somewhere else, calculating and re-calculating my days calories or some stupid OCD crap like that.

She spouts off my temperature, 98.3 or something, and then a little later I hear her say, "123/88". Wait, what? "123/88." Oh my gosh.

"What's wrong?" she asks, "Do I need to take it again, is that high for you?"

"No," I say, "Its just the first time the blood pressure montior fit around my arm and managed to take a reading!"

She laughs.

My arms & hips have always been larger than the rest of my body, and the rest of my body was big as it was. Seriously, the blood pressure monitor was a NORMAL SIZE ARM BAND,  FIT AROUND MY ARM, and READ SOMETHING! It is a miracle. I am happy.

It is crap like this that reassures me that this is worth it. I can become normal.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Weigh-In Monday

Only... it is not a weigh-in Monday! I woke up this morning feeling so bloated & heavy (yes, the dreaded tom..) that I decided not to weigh in. I don't want to be disappointed if I don't see 275, and I'm sure I would be there were it not for the fact my tom is causing my wedding ring to leave imprints, ha ha. Anyway, next week, no excuse, hitting 275, taking pictures.

I am in such a love/hate relationship with this time of year. I hate the heat, I can't stand it. However, it is this time of year that all my family & co-workers bring these lovely little gifts to help me on my diet. Today, I picked up a side salad from Chick-Fil-A and turned it into a monster salad with the help of home-grown tomatoes, cucumbers, and green peppers from various gardens. I love home-grown veggies. Yesterday for lunch, I had cottage cheese & home-grown tomatoes. I love this time of year for fresh veggies.

I am heading to Vegas for a small vacation in September, and I'm excited that I'll be able to fit into the seat better than last time. It's the little things in life that make me happy, ha ha.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Morning or Evening Workouts?

I've been fighting with myself lately. I have the on-going debate about my exercise schedule. You see - naturally, I am a night owl. I do not enjoy waking up early in the morning, and generally my alarm that goes off at 6:30AM still has me zombie-walking around my house.

But - I had in my head that the only good time to exercise is morning. You get the most burn, the most energy, and the best results in the morning. So, I've been forcing myself up at 5:45AM. Let me just tell you - after a few weeks of this only a few times a week, this is not working for me.

Reading around, I found this great article that gives me hope about exercising in the evenings.

  • Late Afternoon is Best for Exercise
    Research shows that the optimal time to exercise is when our body temperature is at its highest, which, for most people is 4 p.m. to 5 p.m. (body temperature is at its lowest just before waking).

  • Strength is Greater in the Afternoon
    Dr. Hill reported that strength output is 5% higher at around mid-day; anaerobic performance, such as sprinting, improves by 5% in the late afternoon.

  • Endurance is Greater in the Afternoon
    Aerobic capacity (endurance) is approximately 4percent higher in the afternoon.

  • Injuries Are Less Likely in the Afternoon
    Afternoon exercise is the best if you want to avoid injuries for many reasons. We are most alert; our body temperature is the highest so our muscles are warm and flexible; and our muscle strength is at its greatest. These three factors make it less likely that we will get injured.

  • Morning Exercisers Are More Consistent
    Even though afternoon exercise might be optimal from a physiological standpoint, research also shows that morning exercisers are more likely to stick to it that late-day athletes.

  • Evening Exercise and Sleep
    Most research supports the idea that exercise can improve sleep quality. But does exercising too late in the evening keep you up? Studies have shown improvements in sleep from both morning and afternoon exercise, so it's not yet clear if evening exercise keeps you up. One study even showed that vigorous exercise half an hour before bedtime did not affect sleep.

  • I've decided - does it really matter when I exercise? If I don't stick with it, any prime time is useless. It doesn't matter if I exercise at 6AM or 10PM, just exercising regularly is probably good enough. I need to stop wasting energy debating with myself and start using it to exercise more consistently - at night!

    Monday, July 18, 2011

    Weigh In Monday

    Today's Weight: 276.1

    Argh, so close to 275 & the progress pics I can taste it!

    Monday, July 11, 2011

    Weigh In Monday

    Today's Weight:          277.9
    Starting Blog Weight:  302.00
    Starting Weight:          335.00

    For my guilty shenanigans this weekend, I had a piece of lasagna & a pieces of garlic bread. But - I planned to have those, so I took it light on breakfast & lunch. ;)

    It's hot. Crazy stupid hot. I am not a fan of summer. I wonder if that will change when I get the weight off?

    Thursday, July 7, 2011


    I’m not big on rewarding myself for losing weight. I mean – I got this way because I was lazy, and I shouldn’t reward myself for doing what I should be doing, in my opinion. So, while I see people that reward themselves anywhere from every 10 pounds to every 25 pounds, I haven’t been big on that.
    I am big, however, on tattoos. I only have one, but I love them. I think, correctly done, they can be beautiful works of art on the body. I’m rather limited in what I can get – my work deems that you can’t visibly see them – so I’m focusing more on quality than quality.
    Therefore, I have decided on two specific rewards for myself. When I’ve lost half the weight I am aiming to lose all together (80 pounds), I will let myself get the upper ear piercing I have been eyeing for a while. I’ve had my ears pierced here twice – it grows over so fast, though, that the moment you take them out they are grown over. (This time I swear I’ll leave them in, ha ha!)
    The second, once I completely reach my goal weight (175), I will get my 2nd tattoo. I’ve found what I want and everything – (see below) – now I just have to get there. And I really want to get there and get my 2nd tattoo! I think I’ll actually have the tattoo completed in color (reds, yellows, & oranges) instead of black.

    Update: Husband says the above tattoo is not only cliche, but trashy, ha ha. I'm second guessing this particular tattoo, but not the tattoo in general! He's trying to get me together with an artist that can create an original design.

    Wednesday, July 6, 2011


    Recently I was told by my 8-year-old nephew that I most certainly must be at least 40. "Why is that? I don't have wrinkles!" I asked.
    “No,” he continues, “but I see bags.”

    Other than really putting me in the mood to grab some cucumbers and schedule a face lift, it really started my thinking about my weight loss. For a long time I was complacent with losing a little at a time, not in a real hurry to get to my goal weight as long as it was trending down. But really – I want to be able to enjoy my weight loss and still be relatively young!

    Men & women take this whole aging thing in totally different directions, and that is so frustrating. I saw a man this morning who was probably in his mid-forties, maybe early 50’s, and he was hot. I mean I took a double-take hot. That doesn’t happen for us women very often – it is all downhill after 30. We have to worry about face sagging, boobs sagging, and general all-over sagging. If you add in the weight loss, which produces skin sagging, I’m fighting a losing battle!

    I want to be able to go into a store, buy a smokin’ hot normal-size outfit, and be noticed in it. And for that I am willing to double my efforts from trying to lose 1 pound a week to 2 pounds a week. That small effort is the difference between 240’s at the end of the year vs. 210’s at the end of the year.

    Just as a note, when I hit 30 I decided to start my anti-aging campaign. Thank you, daily retinol & SPF 15!

    Monday, July 4, 2011

    Thursday, June 30, 2011

    Not the worst complaint to have...

    So, I know it is one of those complaints that you hear and roll your eyes but...

    I absolutely hate how weight is coming off of me. Places I don't want to lose the fat just yet is going faster than expected, and places that I would love to see no fat on are keeping a tight hold.

    The weight seems to be coming off the quickest in my boobs. I don't want that! I like my boobs! However, it doesn't seem to want to come off my arms at all. All I want is to be able to look decent in a sleeveless shirt - is that too much to ask!?!

    At this rate I'm going to be a fat-armed little boobed woman. With fat thighs. And little ankles.  That is just not appealing at all. ;)

    I believe the little 6 year old draws me best...

    Tuesday, June 28, 2011

    Half a Year Gone...

    So I hear on the radio Sunday that half of the year is already gone! That is craziness. Time, I suppose, to reflect on where I was, where I am, and where I'm going (realistically).

    Where I was:
    At the beginning of this year, on January 1st, I was 317 pounds.

    Where I am:
    Currently, 1/2 the year gone, I am 282 pounds (35 pounds down.)

    Where I am going: (Realistically)
    If I stick to what I've done for the year, logic supports in another 1/2 year I will be down to 247 pounds. Honestly, I would be pretty happy with that. To go from 335 pounds to 247 pounds would be amazing. But, that would defeat the purpose of a goal. I know I can hit 247, right? The purpose of a goal is to challenge yourself. But then again, I want to actually be able to meet the goal, haha.

    Anyway, long story short, I am aiming for 235. That would be a grand total of 100 pounds, and a yearly total of 82 pounds. Can you believe 1/2 the year is gone?

    Monday, June 27, 2011

    Weigh In Monday!

    Today's Weight:   282.1

    It's been such an off-month with vacations and what-not, I'm glad to be back on schedule. It puts my mind at ease. No more vacation until the end of the year!

    So, I'm not sure if it is a result of the new health care changes or what, but my company is enacting some massive medical coverage changes. Some are good, some are bad. The part that did interest me was the reductions in cost if you are the following:

    Non-smoker ($16/off your medical coverage per paycheck)
    Get a physical/gyno appointment within the year ($50 off your $500 deductible)
    Take an exam on the companies website ($50 off your $500 deductible)

    And here is the biggie that I am not sure I will qualify for...
    3/5 of the following ($16/off your medical coverage per paycheck):
    1. 35" or less waist circumference for women (I think I might have been that last when I was 12. :))
    2. 150 or less Triglycerides
    3. >50 HDL cholesterol
    4. 130/85 or lower blood pressure
    5. 100 or less fasting glucose
    Now, 3/5 can be achieved even if you are on medication, as long as you qualify. I haven't had a physical in YEARS. I've scheduled my first for August. That way, hopefully by next year I will be able to work on something if it's an issue. I have to hit 2-5 because I just don't believe in that 35" or less waist, haha! :)

    Wednesday, June 22, 2011

    Almond Milk

    The other day, a Facebook friend posted the following message, "Chocolate Almond Milk. YUMMY!" which started my thoughts about Almond Milk. Then, in a Cooking Light magazine, I saw an advertisement for Almond Milk. Almond milk is one of the most nutritionally valuable milk substitutes available today. It is high in a number of vitamins and minerals, including vitamin E, manganese, magnesium, phosphorous, potassium, selenium, iron, fiber, zinc and calcium. Almond milk is low in calories, at only 40 calories per eight ounce serving, and low in fat. It contains only three grams of fat per eight ounce serving. Almond milk is lactose, gluten, casein and cholesterol free; it's also free of saturated fats. (According to the advertisement.)

    Wow - this stuff sounds GREAT! At the next trip to the grocery, I pick up some YUMMY almond milk. No sooner had I gotten home and put up the groceries, I grabbed the almond milk and poured me a huge glass.

    I took a drink, made a sour face, and said, "This stuff tastes like ALMONDS!"

    Husband gives me a strange look and says, "Well, yeah. It is made of almonds. What did you think it tasted like?"

    "Um, milk!"

    He just rolled his eyes. :)

    Monday, June 20, 2011


    I am back from vacation! It was a nice vacation, it only rained once on the beach. I maintained my weight, no gain or loss, and for that I am grateful.

    I am (self-diagnosed) a little OCD, and near the end of the week I was getting ansy to be back home, to be back to my routine. I love my routine. A few days of being away from it is OK, but after a while I yearn to be back home, even if I'm on a tropical paradise.

    I eat better when I'm on my routine. This week at the beach wasn't bad, I would have my carnation instant breakfast in the morning, a tuna fish sandwich at lunch, and then I would splurge on dinner, but it usually consisted of seafood.

    Sunday, being Father's Day, I let hubby pick out what we did. Our kids are at their grandparents this week, so it was an entire day of what he wanted to do. You just can't imagine what happend to me, being without kids and off my routine. I went nuts.

    Sunday Food:
    Breakfast: Carnation Instant Breakfast (Ok, that's a good start.)
    Lunch: Tuna Steak w/ Veggies (Hibachi style, no rice...wow, I've got this!)
    Snack: a KING SIZE Kit-Kat at the movies (justified by my earlier good choices)
    Snack: (wtf another snack?) A small M&M Blizzard after the movies (What?!)
    Dinner: While leaving DQ, saw MCD's and had to have a 10 piece chicken nugget w/ fries. LOL.

    I just absolutely lost it, haha.

    Alas, one day might not pack the weight on, but it was still like, "Where did this train start to derail?!"
    Ah well, back at work today - back on routine today - and eating like a sane person.

    Friday, June 10, 2011

    End of my Non-Challenge!

    So today is the last day for my challenge to myself, and since I won't be anywhere near a scale for the next 8 days, I weighed this morning.

    Today's weight:  283.6

    I am so very happy with the results from the last two weeks, I'm glad I sucked it up and just DID it. The plan, obviously, is just to keep right up with what I am doing. It is working.

    I am off to da beach! tonight, but I do have some posting capabilities. I just don't know if I'll get around to it. ;)

    Have a great next week!

    Wednesday, June 8, 2011

    I should be a crab fisherman.

    Mike Rowe is sexah!
    I love (emphasis on love) Deadliest Catch on A&E. It is probably one of the only reality shows that I think may have a hint of reality to it. (Not to mention Mike Rowe a la Dirty Jobs is the narrator, and I think he’s dreamy.) Last night, they aired a special after the regular show about the greenhorns of DC. In case you aren’t familiar with the term, a greenhorn is basically a newbie. For this example, it is the crab fisherman hired for the very first time on a fishing boat.

    These greenhorns are put through things worse than boot camp or prison, in my opinion. The crab fishing season is in the fall (king crab) and winter (opie season), so as you can imagine in the Bering Sea in Alaska, it’s flippin’ cold. They work up to 48 hours with as little as 4 hours of sleep. They lift 80 pounds of bait up to 110 times a day. Now that’s what I call a work out!

    It is true that misery loves company; since the greenhorns aren’t veteran fisherman yet, they don’t get the full pay that the veterans do. All of them get paid based on the amount of crab they pull in, however the greenhorns get paid less than the veterans. On average, the greenhorns make $22/hour after lifting 80 pounds over 100 times a day.

    I have seen one woman on deck during the many seasons of DC that have aired. Supposedly it is bad luck to have a woman on deck, but also I doubt there are many women out there that could handle the upper body strength requirement for the job.

    It is a great show! It makes you feel like a lazy bum for the lack of exercise compared to them. A great motivator! ;)

    A greenhorn who didn't make it.

    Tuesday, June 7, 2011

    Calorie Restiction Society

    Did you know there was a Calorie Restriction Society out there? I didn’t. It really is interesting reading if you find the time. In a nutshell, the CRS is:

    • A calorie restricted diet that is based on scientific evidence that, when introduced gradually to a CR diet, mice lived longer and were healthier.
    • In general, reducing gradually your calorie intake to 25% less than what is suggested for your body weight/height.
    • It is suggested you reduce the calories gradually, taking up to a year, because other studies have shown that if you slash them quickly, you actually lessen your life span.

    Pretty interesting read, I found it via Yahoo!. Obviously, the amount of calories you should consume changes as the weight drops, but I should currently be taking in 2145 calories per day.

    For some reason that just doesn’t sound like the extreme restriction I was expecting. Maybe that is just because I’m fat right now. ;) If I were at my goal weight, I would need to be taking in 1629 per day.

    Anyway, just an interesting read I thought!

    Friday, June 3, 2011

    1 Week Down, 1 To Go

    Oh yes, one week is already gone in my not-so-much-of-a-summer-challenge! Depsite all the crap that's been going on around the house, I am happy to report this moring I was 286! This is craziness, people. Eat the right amount, exercise regularly, and drink water and you DO lose weight! Mind boggling, I tell you.

    I hope you all have a great weekend, I am off to become a hermit in my house since the temperature is heading up near 100 this weekend. That is just nasty, people.

    Thursday, June 2, 2011

    So, Interestingly Enough...

    Obviously, I've been MIA for a bit.

    Husband managed to get not only a bladder infection and UTI infection, but also a prostate infection! (poor guy) After spending a bit of the weekend at the ER, we have been on the road to recovery for the past couple of days. I've been running my butt off (literally, haha) trying to take care of him & the kids.

    He's still recovering, but I think we are on the road to recovery. Crappy part is, we leave for the beach in 9 days, and his antibiotics he's on is "sun sensitive". We are debating as to whether that means to stay out of the sun completely, or make sure to use SPF 50 sunblock. Anyone know?

    I checked the scales this morning, the first time since I've started my challenge and everything went haywire, and it does read 287! Of course, that would mean I would have to lose 2 pounds by tomorrow to make it 5 pounds for the week....

    Thursday, May 26, 2011

    My 2 Week Summer Challenge! (Sorta)

                          Starting weight:                       290
    Wildest Dreams Goal weight:                      280
             Most likely goal weight:                       285

    Plan: A reduction of calories from 1500 to 1200 daily. Water daily. Exercise 1 hour daily. Walk 6,000 steps daily.

    After informing hubby of my challenge and reminding him that he will be in a bathing suit in 2 weeks, he has also joined my challenge! (Easier to cook at nights now!)

    Here we go!

    Tuesday, May 24, 2011

    It's a Challenge! Sorta.

    So, on June 10, 2011, I leave for a trip to the beautiful beaches. Because I’m partially bored and because….well, no really I’m just a little bored with the weight loss, I’m going to make myself a contest.

    Okay, contest isn’t the best word, since I won’t be rewarding myself. I guess the reward will come in my bathing suit but you know... technically it’s not a contest. Anyway, long story short, beginning Friday I will be taking the next 2 weeks to lose as much weight as possible.

    What’s the goal? I would like to see 280, which would be a 10 pound loss. Considering I’ve been averaging a 1lb/week loss, I don’t know if that is reasonable or not. I guess that’s why it’s a challenge, right?

    What’s the plan? I have no idea. First and foremost, I will exercise 1 hour per day. I’ve been terribly crappy in the exercise department. As for caloric intake, I’ve not decided if I want to restrict my calories to 1200, go on a protein shake diet, low carbohydrate, or what yet. I need to also up my water intake to 18 cups a day.

    What’s the payout? Like I said before, other than my bathing suit, I foresee no payout. Hopefully I’ll gain the determination not to blow my diet on vacation like I did last year!

    I'll update the *contest* details on Thursday.

    Monday, May 23, 2011

    11th Weigh In - 5/23/11

    Today's Weight: 290.0 (-0.2)

    Not terribly upset about this, I just came back from a mini-vacation. I always reach for the same weight as I left when I go on vacation!
    Happy Monday!

    Thursday, May 19, 2011

    All My Weight Loss is in Vain...

    It appears as though all my weight-loss efforts have been in vain.

    The world is going to end on Saturday. Well, at least for us Christian believers.

    The best part about the article on Yahoo!, is that there is a group of atheists who are actually profiting from the end-of-the-world predictions. You sign a contract, give them $135, and they promise to go get your pets after you head up to heaven. The contract is good for 10 years, and they have 259 clients already.

    What the hell is wrong with those 259 people?

    Tuesday, May 17, 2011

    S2H Replay

    Sometimes it is just nice when two worlds collide.

    In an effort to get debt free, I am always on the search for ways to save money. Recently, I have been enamored with Extreme Couponing on TLC. Now, I could never be the crazy coupon vixens these women (and some men) are, but it has inspired me to watch what is on sale, plan my meals around it, and find some coupons to add to it.

    Yesterday I found a cool new little gadget that I am totally interested in. It is called the S2H Replay, and it is one awesome rewards program. For every 60 minutes of activity, you get a reward code. You transfer your reward codes into actual rewards. Free. Other than the initial purchase price for the watch ($19.95), you pay nothing.
    It feels like my FitBit only with rewards! I think I’ll try it out. Here is a small list of the rewards available:

    Xbox 360                     9600 points
    Music/Ringtones         200-300 points
    PlayStation 3               12,000 points
    $5 gift card                 ~900 points

    Monday, May 16, 2011

    10th Weigh In - 5/16/2011

    Today's weight:  290.2

    I'm back in the saddle again after the week long 24 hour bug. :)

    I've decided to do new pictures when I hit 275. Hopefully 15 pounds will go quick! Happy Monday!

    Monday, May 2, 2011

    8th Weigh In - 5/02/11

    Today's Weight:   293.1

    Loss of 1.5lbs ~ and we got Bin Laden. It's a good day! :)

    Friday, April 29, 2011

    10K Steps A Day

    Yeah, after two weeks of wearing my wonderful FitBit, I *unsurprisingly* found that I don't walk anywhere close to 10,000 steps per day. I do figure, however, this is the easiest way to get in some extra exercise. According to those higher scientist powers that be, "a person who walks 10,000 steps a day will burn between 2000 and 3500 extra Calories per week."

    On average, I walk about 4,000 steps a day.  That puts me pretty close to sedentary. Disgraceful.

    Starting yesterday, I have decided to add an additional 2,000 steps for this week. One walk around my office area equals 1,000 steps, and I do this once in the morning and once and night. I will hopefully make it up to 10,000 steps in a few weeks.

    I hope I can see the effect on the scales!

    Thursday, April 28, 2011

    Addicted To Food

    Heavy, one of my favorite shows, is off for the season. While that is certainly depressing, I have found another great show to take its place. Addicted to Food is a great show, if you haven't seen it. It's on the OWN network (which I didn't even know existed), and I have a new favorite hero in Tennie McCarty.

    "Denial is not even knowing we are lying to ourselves."

    "Compulsive eaters are controllers."

    "We love her anyway."

    Wednesday, April 27, 2011

    The Actual Pot-Luck & Admin-Professionals Day!

    First of all, Happy Administrative Professionals Day to all you Administrative Professionals out there! We gave our lovely admin some flowers and a card to show our appreciation today. She is actually the reason I decided to form the "Bikini-Ready" pot luck, she recently was diagnosed with diabetes and sometimes feels left out of our "normal" pot lucks.

    I did bring my taco soup, and it was a hit. All told, I still feel like I could puke, but if I did I would puke healthy food. That should count for something, right?  I've had blackberries, strawberries, taco soup, and spinach salad. For dessert, a friend of mine brought THE MOST DELICIOUS no-fat, no-sugar dessert, I kid you not. I would recommend this so simple recipe to anyone.

    White Chocolate Fudge Mousse

    • 1 box (1 ounce) Sugar Free Instant White Chocolate Pudding (JELL-O)
    • 1 1/3 cups 1% low-fat milk (or skim milk)
    • 1 cup Light Cool Whip, refrigerated (or similar whipped topping)
    • 1 box (1 ounce) Sugar Free Instant Chocolate Fudge Pudding (JELL-O)
    • 1 1/3 cups 1% low fat milk (or skim milk)
    • 1 cup Light Cool Whip, refrigerated (or similar whipped topping)
    • 1/2 cup Light Cool Whip (optional garnish)
    • Dusting of cocoa powder (optional garnish)
    1. Beat white chocolate pudding mix into 1 1/3 cups COLD milk in mixing bowl on medium-low speed for about 2 minutes. Scrape sides of bowl halfway and continue mixing. Stir in a cup of Cool Whip, mixing by hand just until blended. Pour into individual serving dishes. You can use the back of a spoon to smooth the tops.
    2. In same mixing bowl, beat chocolate fudge pudding mix into 1 1/3 cups COLD milk in mixing bowl on medium-low speed for about 2 minutes. Scrape sides of bowl halfway and continue mixing. Stir in a cup of Cool Whip, mixing by hand just until blended. Pour into individual serving dishes. You can use the back of a spoon to smooth the tops.
    3. Cover individual dishes with plastic wrap or foil and keep in refrigerator until ready to serve. Add a dollop of Light Cool Whip to the center of each and top that with a sprinkle of cocoa powder if desired.
    8 servings

    Nutritional Information:
    Per serving: 104 calories, 3 g protein, 17 g carbohydrate, 2.8 g fat, 2.5 g saturated fat, 0 mg cholesterol, 0 g fiber, 346 mg sodium. Calories from fat: 24 percent

    Tuesday, April 26, 2011

    Office Pot Luck

    It is our monthly pot luck @ the office tomorrow - normally a horrible time that I loathe and binge, but I organized tomorrow's pot luck! So, tomorrow's pot luck theme is "Bikini-Ready Pot Luck" and it includes only good-for-you foods.

    I am bringing taco soup, and although I have never tried it, it seems fairly easy. It's a crock-pot recipe, of course it's easy!

    --2 cans of kidney beans
    --2 cans of pinto beans
    --2 cans of corn
    --1 large can of diced tomatoes
    --1 can tomatoes and chilies
    --1 packet taco seasoning
    --1 packet ranch dressing mix
    --1 lb browned ground turkey or hamburger
    --shredded cheese and sour cream for embellishment (optional)


    The Directions:

    --brown meat if you are going to use it
    --drain fat and add to crock pot stoneware insert (the meat. not the fat.)
    --sprinkle seasoning packets on top of meat
    --drain and rinse the beans and add
    --add the ENTIRE contents of the corn and tomato cans

    Cover and cook on low for 8-10 hours or on high for 4-5. I think the longer you cook soup, the better, so if you have the time, opt for cooking on low. Stir well, and serve with a handful of shredded cheese and a dollop of sour cream.
    Without the sour cream or cheese, it has about 200 calories per serving. Eat the taco soup with some veggie/fruit tray, and it's a good pot luck!

    Monday, April 25, 2011

    7th Weigh In - 4/25/2011

    Today's Weight:                   294.6
    Starting Weight:                  302.0
    Weight loss to date:            -7.94 lbs in 6 weeks      

    Easter hit me hard, ha ha. But I had a great weekend, and that is what matters. My spontaneous activity was Saturday, hubby and I went target shooting. It was my first time ever shooting guns, and I had always been leery of it in the past. But I did it, and I actually had a good time! It's one heck of a stress reliever.

    Happy Monday!

    Friday, April 22, 2011


    So hubby and I sat down and had a huge heart to heart - about issues going on with ourselves and issues with us together - and I think it worked out well for me. I'm trying my hardest to focus on my issues.

    I am working through a book that basically says I need to worry about my life, and let others live their own. I don't think that means not work on issues in a marriage, but I think that means instead of laying blame on someone else, I need to stop and evaluate what my contribution to the problem is, and fix my issues.

    One of the other lightbulb moments for me in this book (which I will probably reveal at a later time - I need to work up the courage to share some things on my blog) was that no amount of control is going to help any situation. Control is a farce. We have no control over anything but ourselves. I can only fix what's wrong with me, and offer support to those who want to work through their own problems.

    Anyway, being spontaneous is something I have learned recently that I need to work on. Actually I am not spontaneous at all. It's partly due to my weight issues, but I feel like if I have some control over what is happening or going to happen, I can manage. If I plan where I'm going, I can determine if I'll need to wear something to try and hide my fat, or if I need to avoid somewhere (hello, roller coasters) that I won't fit, or figure out the best place to stand so the least amount of people notice me (hello, social parties).

    I am going to do one spontaneous activity this weekend, that is my plan. Baby steps!
    Happy Weekend!

    Thursday, April 21, 2011


    I really do not know what I would do without my husband. He is able to put so many things into perspective for me it's crazy.
    He gently let me in on the fact that although he is 100% behind my weight loss goal, that I may be neglecting other parts of my life.
    I took a while to think it over, and I realize that I have been. I am so focused on losing weight that I have let other parts of my life slip, and that just isn't healthy either.
    I find myself thinking about food a larger part of the day than I should, and I need to make a conscious effort not to. I want to get to a place when I don't think about food, that I think about other important things and I just eat for energy.
    It's a huge hill to climb, but it is going to be a big part of getting healthy.

    Tuesday, April 19, 2011

    The Teeth - Day 10

    Can I say that I *REALLY* hope I'm able to see these results with my weight loss too?

    I started using the Crest Whitening Toothpaste along with the Whitening strips. This stuff is amazing.

    Day 0 VS Day 3 VS Day 10

    Monday, April 18, 2011

    6th Weigh In - 4/18/2011

    Today's Weight:   295.5

    I am very happy with this week's weigh-in. This means I've lost all my vacation water weight plus. :)

    Hubby bought me a Fitbit! I used it all weekend, and now I have it on at work. I can definitely tell that I walk around a lot more on the weekends than the weekdays. I suppose that's another good reason it's time to start doing exercises on those days.

    Happy Monday!

    Friday, April 15, 2011

    Happy Friday!

    It's a dark, rainy, blustery day here, and I don't want to be working! I would love to be at home in my pajamas, reading the new Lincoln & Child book that's calling my name. I love to read - but when you have 2 little ones running around your ankles I find that it's getting harder and harder to find the time. When they go to bed, I'm usually not far behind.

    I am going to *try* and start logging my food for realz, not necessarily just in my head. Usually during the day I'm calculating up the totals, and I might be approximating here and there. I might have better luck if I can write it down and actually see the totals on paper. Maybe that 40 calorie coffee creamer doesn't look so appealing on paper, right? Maybe I'll skip the coffee creamer when I see it on paper, and see that I can do without it.

    Anyway, I hope you all have a great weekend! And, just in case you were wondering...

    Breakfast:    Oatmeal               290 (I have a soft spot for McDonald's new Oatmeal...)
                            Milk                     100
                          Coffee Creamer     40
    Snack:           Thin Crisps          130
    Lunch:            Salad                   200
                          Lean Cuisine        230
    Snack:            Milano                 120
    Dinner:           Hot Dog              346
                          Tater Tots            127

    Total: 1587

    Thursday, April 14, 2011

    Cheating the Scale

    In a recent survey by a British-based diet website, about 3,000 women were asked how they try to cheat the scale.  

    50% Weigh themselves naked
    40% Go to the bathroom first
    10% Hold their breath
    3%  Stand on one leg
    3% Wait for a full moon

    Let's see....

    Weight themselves naked - always.
    Go to the bathroom first - of course.
    Hold their breath - yep.
    Stand on one leg - I don't think I can stand on one leg on my scale. I may need to try that!
    Wait for a full moon - I can honestly say I've never done this one.

    I can also claim to use the following methods to cheat the scale: haircut, shaving legs, only weighing early in the morning. :)

    Wednesday, April 13, 2011

    FDA proposes more calorie count information

    Today I had an (almost) all day office meeting. It was phenomenally boring. As a result, I began searching the Internet for random news articles that interest me, and came across this.

    I will not lie; I was on the fence about this for a long time. I knew personally I would benefit greatly from restaurants putting caloric information on their menus, but I had heard that it was rather expensive for restaurants to submit their food for the testing required. The proposal by the FDA is for restaurants with more than 20 locations be required to put their caloric information on the menu. This helps out not only me but also the small businesses out there. I like it.

    It surprised me when I went into Panera the other day and they had their calorie information on the menu. I was head-down in my iPhone, trying to look up the nutritional information. My husband kept nudging me to give my order, and I kept ingnoring him. Finally, after the 3rd nudge, I rather nastily said, "I'm looking up the calorie information, you go first!" To which I had to apologize profusely after I realized he was trying to show me the calorie information was already up there.

    Oops. But, woohoo Panera!

    Tuesday, April 12, 2011

    The Teeth - Day 3

    I am way past day 3 of my whitening treatment for my teeth, but I haven't had a chance to upload the picture.  I honestly didn't think I'd see a difference after 3 days, but I did. I can even tell a bigger difference when it is side by side.

    Awesomeness! I'm looking forward to seeing day 20.

    Day 0 VS Day 3

    Monday, April 11, 2011

    5th Weigh In - 4/11/2011

    Today's weight: 297.5

    This is not totally unexpected. I am coming off a vacation weekend, and my rings are cutting off circulation to my fingers. :)

    I enjoyed myself this weekend! I didn't come home with what we'll call " loads of money", but I had a good time gambling nevertheless. The key to gambling is like the key to weight loss - all in moderation. I did manage to make it home with some money, and since I consider that found money I went out and bought Your Shape: Fitness Evolved for the Kinect/Xbox.

    I went bowling Saturday night and I woke up Sunday sore all over. I figure that's a clue that it is time to start exercising. ;)

    Wednesday, April 6, 2011

    The Parent Trap

    As I mentioned before, I'm currently on my way to gamble a bit of my tax return away. As it so happens, my mother is a heck of a lot of fun gambling, so she is going with us. Tonight is a short lay-over in the city she lives, and then we will head that way tomorrow.

    It is amazing what junk food you can find exploding around this house. Without trying hard, I have already located the following:
    1. Double-stuff Oreos
    2. Chips-Ahoy
    3. Pringles
    4. Cosmic Brownies (which pack a whopping 280 calories per brownie)
    5. Tons of Snickers Bars
    6. Whole Milk (Whole milk mom, really?)
    7. A jar full of M&Ms
    My parents don't eat this stuff. No, they keep it around for us kids & their grand kids. "How's the diet going?" my mom asks after offering me whole milk & cookies.

    I guess that's what parents are for!

    Monday, April 4, 2011

    4th Weigh In - 4/4/2011

    Today's weight: 297

    I think I may need to read up on the law of diminishing returns. ;)

    Not too worried about it, this morning my wedding ring is so tight it's leaving a red ring around my ring finger. I must be retaining water for some reason, could be stress, could be too much salt, could be because it is that time.

    My 6 year old daughter, Big Red (her brother & her have red hair from some strange recessive gene in our family - hubby & I are brunettes.) is heading to Disney this morning with her grandparents. Flying always makes me nervous, and I am especially nervous since I'm not there with her. (Hello, my name is Rae Rae J and I'm a control freak.)

    Have a great Monday!

    Wednesday, March 30, 2011

    Crest 3D White Whitestrips Professional Effects

    I realized the other day I still had a gift card from Amazon to use that was left over from Christmas. I contemplated a new video game (I am a video game nerd.) but I decided it wouldn't really be a present for me since my husband would surely rogue it. Therefore, I decided since I was trying to lose this weight, I would do something for my appearance.

    After reading many reviews and searching out friends for advice, I decided to try the Crest 3D White Whitestrips Professional Effects. I will be starting tomorrow, and I thought the blog would be a great way to visualize the changes.

    The product touts the following: "After 10 days, you'll get long-lasting, professional-level whitening." and "Noticeable whitening varies by person, but most people start seeing whiter teeth after 3 days, with full whitening upon completion. Crest 3D White Whitestrips Pro Effects gives you a smile makeover in just 10 days."

    I use a strip a day for 20 days. I figure I will take follow up pictures at Day 3, 10, & 20. Here's hoping!
    Day 0

    Tuesday, March 29, 2011

    Legacies & Bequests

    This past week my husband and I finally sat down with our lawyer and created not only our living wills, but also our dead wills. It’s a hard thing to do, I’ve found, facing your mortality. However, there are two little people depending on us now.

    It actually has refueled my fire to lose this weight. I hadn’t lost my previous fire, mind you, but I have gained more fuel. I would much rather be able to take out the guardians from my will in twenty years then have to rely on them.

    A new study out shows women start to feel old at 29. (You men are different sorts; you don’t start to feel old until late 50’s.) I don’t know if I feel old at 30, but I definitely no longer feel that I am immortal. I no longer have that teenage ideal that I’m going to live forever. I think that’s part of the reason I started losing weight; I realize I can’t eat, eat, and eat and expect to live into my 80’s or 90’s.

    I have to do this for myself, my kids, and my husband. I also want to use my 401k. J

    Monday, March 28, 2011

    3rd Weigh In - 3/28/2011

    Today's Weight: 298.6

    Slow and steady wins the race, right? At least I'm below my goal for the month - 300. I wonder if you are supposed to alter your goals if you beat your goal weight? For example, next month my goal weight is 295. However I hope to keep up 5 pounds a month weight loss, I wonder if I should alter my goal weight for next month to 293?


    Friday, March 25, 2011

    Stuffing to Sedate

    The other day at work (I’m quickly learning via this blog that we gab a lot at work.) we were discussing cravings. My friend had mentioned that she was craving ice cream. My other co-worker said she was craving cake. These are two very normal cravings. They turned to me, and asked me what I was craving. I tried to think about a particular food I was craving, I really did. However, the only thing that I kept coming back to was, “I am craving food.

    Food? What do you mean? I mean I crave food. It almost doesn’t matter what type of food it is. I crave mass quantities of food. “I want to eat until I get that full feeling in my stomach, then that quashes my craving.”

    It’s sad, but it’s true. Because they are nice friends, they started thinking about the type of food I could do that with. “What about popcorn? Veggies? You could eat chicken like that.” The sad reality is I can’t do that.

    I can’t eat until I’m satiated. In my mind I know that if I do, I’ll be giving into something weird psychological issues in me that will just open the door for mass quantities of bad food. Nope, there will be no binges! I’m sure somewhere in here I probably need to go to see a shrink to figure out why I want to eat until I’m sedated, but I’m on a debt reduction plan, people! No money for a food shrink because I’m already seeing my Dave Ramsey shrink, ha ha.

    Oh yeah, I'm eating Chinese take-out tonight because of the basketball games. If that isn't a true test of resisting food binging, I don't know what is.

    Thursday, March 24, 2011

    On Being Called Fat

    Yesterday a friend at work was complaining about her life in general, and how depressed she was. I thought for a moment and then asked, "Why are you depressed? You have lots of things going for you."

    In all honesty, she does have a lot going for her. She has a great job, a great house (I know, I've been there!), 2 healthy kids, and a husband. She takes at least 3 vacations a year, and she always wears the latest fashions. She answers, "A stranger and my husband have called me fat this week."

    It turns out they didn't really call her fat, but it was implied both times. Her husband was nagging her on the foods she ate and telling her she needed to get up and go back to the gym (and not in the nice supportive way.) The stranger was a young college girl who was supposed to give her a spray tan. The young girl told my friend she "wouldn't feel comfortable giving her a spray tan."

    She is a big girl just like me, so we often have frank conversations about weight. We both know we're fat; but we don't want others saying it. For some reason, if we talk about it - it's okay. If others talk about it, it sends us into a spiraling dump. I feel bad for her, she's an emotional eater and this recent hurt has sent her running back to food.

    The really bad part is there is nothing I can say to her; I would have reacted the same way probably.

    Wednesday, March 23, 2011

    I Fell Off My Pink Cloud with a Thud

    Big girls need big diamonds. ~ Elizabeth Taylor

    The post today is in remembrance of a great woman who not only embraced her curves, but made them work for her.

    I hope one day I can say I reached my goal weight, kept my wonderful curves, and made them work for me.

    RIP, Elizabeth Taylor~ 3/23/2011

    Tuesday, March 22, 2011

    World Water Day!

    Uhh, what's a half flush in the loo?

    I realize that World Water Day doesn’t quite entail making sure you drink your 64 ounces per day, but it sure gives a good platform for talking about it! While the world’s top engineers, scientists, and business folk attempt to hash out our future water needs, I decided to take a minute to hash out my WIO, water-intake objectives.

    I used to loathe drinking water. Growing up, I never drank just plain water. It was always diet coke/diet pepsi, sweet tea, kool-aid, or some such drink. I don’t think to this day I’ve seen my parents order water at a restaurant. But in my deepening research into weight loss, I’ve found that water is the best drink of choice to lose weight.

    Just like T.B. (Taco Bell), water works into my goals this year two-fold. Cokes/tea have gotten stupid expensive at restaurants, some charging as high as $2.19. I find that mind boggling, and I have vowed in my debt-reduction plan to never again pay for my drink at a sit-down restaurant. (Fast food joints are still pretty reasonable on drinks, although they are still high.) Secondly, it helps me shed pounds.

    It took a very, very long time to get used to drinking water. At restaurants, it has to have ice. However, when I’m drinking it throughout the day to get my 64 ounces in, it has to have no ice. I don’t even attempt to understand myself, I just go with it. 

    It also took a very, very, very long time to get used to the frequent bathroom trips. I’m thinking, based on my week so far, I’ve gotten adjusted. I hope. People are looking at me funny at work.  I imagine they either think I’m doing coke in the bathroom or having horrendous diarrhea.